monday again. another weekend passed.
from 5-ish sunday til 9-ish monday morning is hardest for me... i'm comforted all weekend by thoughts of her, knowing that she's with me and thinking that i'm with her. sunday evenings were a time she was often able to call me and i tick the minutes away thinking "she might call", then "if she's gonna be able to call it'll have to be soon" and finally, by 8, "there's no way she'd be able to get out to call now".
and then i wonder about her weekend. did they fight? did they have a good time together? where's her head? where's her heart? where's her life?
i'm less frenzied but no less ?worried?. perhaps "more accepting" is closer. more accepting of the future i won't have. i know it's still possible; so is winning the lottery.
i wait for her. i wait for her call, her summons to meet, her invitation into her life.
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