i hate my life, this life. hate it. long periods of 'without her' punctuated by brief periods of 'with her'.
i want this emptiness over.
except for those brief periods where she smiles on me, it's empty, i'm empty.
it could be so much more.
if only she were in it. in it more. in all of my life.
i want his life.
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About Me
- Student of Life
- Mid-life, divorced. My Description - Probably immature - "arrested development"? Probably selfish, self centered, emotionally immature. Insecure. Someone else's description: "a warm, interesting, stimulating, sincere, funny, sexual, imaginative, caring, giving man". You reconcile the two, I can't.
Cast of Characters
- me - 50ish, divorced. Married almost 18 years. I've discovered a lot about my own sexuality and what I want sexually. I found B in July 2003.
- B - female, 40. Was in a serious, live in love relationship for 14 years. Married for almost two years now. We made an almost instant sexual, emotional and intellectual connection. B is the most sexual, sensual woman I've ever known. She's professional, a business owner, strong, hard headed, stubborn, up standing.
- bf - B's
boyfriendhusband.
Blog Archive
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2006
(272)
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January
(40)
- the treasure that was
- hate it
- the unbearable passage of time
- coming back
- :-)
- the outline of a plan
- home field advantage
- a revision
- silence
- so much to say. but nothing to say
- if only
- it seems...
- quite the blow
- it's a start!
- and now?
- and then?
- every weekend a three day weekend
- so soon
- i don't know what to do
- blooms
- is it all over but the shouting?
- a moveie quote
- just like that
- #11
- impossible
- #10
- 8 rules for dating my daughter
- A Tale of Two Cities, revisited
- Can't get there from here
- a tale of two cities
- please tell me
- illusions of the heart
- growth and learning
- "oh, fuck" #49
- monday #125 (+/-)
- best laid plans
- mmmmmmmm
- what to do?
- stuck
- Happy New Year
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January
(40)
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