as usual today, i turned good conversation this morning into a thing of hurt, silence, distance.
today i told her of a long held fear of mine - that (g-d forbid) she should ever be hurt or killed in an accident, i'd never know. it would appear as though she just didn't want to talk anymore. i couldn't call anyone, couldn't check newspapers or public records, because i don't know who she is.
she had no reaction.
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About Me
- Student of Life
- Mid-life, divorced. My Description - Probably immature - "arrested development"? Probably selfish, self centered, emotionally immature. Insecure. Someone else's description: "a warm, interesting, stimulating, sincere, funny, sexual, imaginative, caring, giving man". You reconcile the two, I can't.
Cast of Characters
- me - 50ish, divorced. Married almost 18 years. I've discovered a lot about my own sexuality and what I want sexually. I found B in July 2003.
- B - female, 40. Was in a serious, live in love relationship for 14 years. Married for almost two years now. We made an almost instant sexual, emotional and intellectual connection. B is the most sexual, sensual woman I've ever known. She's professional, a business owner, strong, hard headed, stubborn, up standing.
- bf - B's
boyfriendhusband.
Blog Archive
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2006
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May
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- instant restart
- sometimes
- at a loss
- and now?
- and so it starts
- just the tip of the iceberg
- ouch
- unrequited love
- unconfirmed reports now appear true
- Answer: the dodo. dinosaurs. grocery shopping.
- i don't understand
- so hard
- how much is enough?
- and today?
- as usual
- Glory Days
- the end of an era
- a man walks a road, alone, searching. he doesn't k...
- who is me?
- confidence in knowing
- what price?
- loss
- life as literature
- the lack of time
- why would i think that?
- stuck on a thought
- what's happening?
- doing nothing is even harder
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May
(28)
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