elation

last night and this morning when i awoke, i was thinking about her (nothing unusual in that). she didn't feel well friday and she went home a little early. i thought about her all weekend, hoping that she was feeling better, but knowing that there was a chance that she might not come in today.

still, she's pretty tough and i didn't really expect her to be out today.

so when she called of course i was happy. happy to hear her, happy she's feeling better, even though not happy that she's still not over it.

we talked.

i wish i could explain, put into words, what that's like for me. she's a drug. and i cannot get enough of her. when we reconnect for the first time like this, i can feel, physically feel myself getting elated. i feel myself speeding up. my mood soars, even if it was good before. i'm like the kid who got to pick out the one present they most wanted in the world and i can see them bringing it to me from the back of the store. i -know- what it is, what i'm getting. it's what i want. and the elation that i feel as i hear her and talk to her is just... amazing.

she is what i want.

my entire being smiles.

if only i could smile with her. wake up to her. hold her.

i wonder if she smiles the same way for him.

i wonder if she smiles the same way for me.

she's back in my world again.

life is good.