thoughts

i've been thinking about attraction, affection, love, lust and desire. and attachment.

the number one ?rule? about all of those emotions is that they are not reciprocal emotions; they go one way. feeling any of those for someone else does not, in any way, shape or form, imply that the object of those feelings has any of those feelings for you in return. that's a huge misconception that most of us carry.

the fallacious idea seems to scale, too. when we like someone a little, we tend to assume that they like us a little as well. when we lust someone a lot, it's generally ?assumed? that they lust back with nearly the same intensity. if we didn't think so, we'd lose interest, or recognize that it's wasted.

when you love someone, you certainly assume they love you back. is it an assumption or just a hope? because of the ?importance? of an emotion like love, i'm inclined to think that if we let ourselves get into the realm of calling it "love" that we must be pretty confident that those feelings are returned.

the amount of ?expectation? we hold for the reciprocation of our feelings seems to be related to how ?important? we consider that other person in our life. if it's someone we've just met, while we may want them to like us, if they don't, well, it's okay.

but what about when that other person is -the one-? what if they are so much exactly what you've been looking for all your life that it seems as though the description was written about them? what if everything you've ever wanted in a friend/lover/partner was embodied in one person and you had the great fortune to actually find that person?

imagine how much importance you'd place on that. how much would you hope, pray, need them to feel the same way?

imagine what it would be like to not have your wants, needs and feelings reciprocated.