why?

why do i try so hard? why do i try so hard to give her opportunities and reasons for why she should give me her name or her number, or tell her how i feel, or how we'd be together or why we should meet?

if she wanted to, she'd do it. period.

she feels she can't trust me with her name or number.

she won't feel for me because she feels for him.

she won't meet because she's with him.

she won't listen to or think about what we'd be like together because she's already there, in -that- life.

so why do i do it? why do i try, at every opportunity, to ?sell? her on how we'd be, on why we should be? she knows. and she has complete control, the power to choose whatever she wants.

if she wanted it, she'd have it.

so why do i keep trying?

because she's worth it. because i love her so much it hurts. because i want her so much it hurts. because even though the chance of ever seeing her is infinitesimally small, and growing smaller with every passing day, i have to. she's the one. i couldn't live with myself if i let her go without trying everything in my power to have her.