maybe i'm dense. mayeb i expect too much. maybe i think i'm more (to her) than i really am. maybe i don't understand her situation.
its three days. three long fucking days after six, SIX fucking days without her, an we had maybe an hour to talk on friday. one fucking hour in TEN fucking days. one hour. ten days. g-d, looking back i can't believe it's been so little for so long.
imiss her so much.
this is what the rest of my life is going to be like. missing her. wannting her. not having her.
three days since we talked. is it ?unreasonable? to think that in three days she would be alone for 30 minutes and able to call for 1, 2, 3, even 5 minutes? is that so unreasonable? if she really wanted to, if seh really missed me, wouldnt' she make tje time, the effort?
i sat at work today, wonderng why she didnt' call. where shewas, why she wasn't caling.
(shes in a relationship that she wans to stay in)
the fuck is wrongw with me? when am i gonna understan?d, finally figure it out?
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