Waking Up

Have you ever woken up or snapped out of a daydream and for just an instant wondered "where the heck am I?" What if you did that and realized that it wasn't a daydream, but your life?

I'm a pretty typical guy.
Educated, professional, traveled, career guy. I've been in the more or less same technical field for twenty five years. I've been pretty successful, career-wise, always moving up or moving for new skills. I've published an article or two, even co-authored a book. (BTW, in case you're wondering, writing technical books, as a rule, sucks.)

Many years ago I married, for the second time. I have children. We moved to a great place, bought a great home, had a pretty good life. We didn't have everything, we weren't wealthy although we didn't lack much. We were healthy, the children were healthy.

One day, well, a day that lasted a couple of months, I began to realize that things just weren't right. Not with her or home or work, but with me. I didn't want to do anything. I mean, nothing. My hobbies no longer interested me. I began to hate work and my profession. I drank more. I socialized less. NOTHING made me happy or interested or involved in the least.

I had never been very sympathetic for people who said they were depressed. "Get over it", I thought. "Quit complaining, what do you have to be depressed about?" I started to read about depression and the lightbulb started to flicker. Could I be depressed?

Meanwhile, a friend had had success with getting treatment for depression. I saw what a difference it made for my friend, so I decided to do the same.

It probably saved my life.