she still laughs with me. we still have conversations unlike what either of us has with anyone else. (unless she has them with her master/lover, which i'm still not sure about).
-i- feel we connect on a different level than with other people; or at least i do with her. i know she used to feel the same way... but that was -before-.
in the meantime the roller coaster ride continues... from elation and hope to despair and hopelessness.
is what i want really such a big thing? after all, all i want is for her to forgive me for betraying her and abandoning her, then to take me back, then to leave her new husband and her comfortable life, give up her lover/master and want me to own her again, to want -me- to be her Master again and try to live with me. for the rest of our lives...
is that really asking so much?
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