what i didn't do on my summer vacation

admittedly, there were many things i -hoped- i'd get to do on my vacation.

i'd hoped to win her heart back. hoped to hold her. hoped to convince her that there would never be a better time than TODAY to leave bf/hubby and start our life together. hoped we'd fuck. hoped we'd start making plans for us.

then, there were things that i actually expected would happen: that we'd see each other, that we'd kiss, that it would be tentative, short and that she WOULD NOT be leaving with me.

there's also three, maybe four things that i'd REALLY, REALLY hoped she would make (let?) happen, no matter how difficult just being close to me was, simply because, well, they're fucking important. or, they are to me, anyway and by extension, to her.

we've had a few "ceremonies" or "rituals" (neither of those feel like the right word) in the last few months. we've exchanged commitment rings. she's accepted and is wearing my cuff on her wrist, as a sign of ownership, 24/7. i've sent her and she's worn a couple times, my collar and a dog tag.

remember, this is the first time we've seen each other in ten months. so all the above happened remotely.

what that means is, -i- put her ring on my finger. she put my ring on hers. -she- fastened my slave cuff on her wrist. -she- buckled my collar around her neck.

she's about as romantic as i am (ie, a lot!) and feels the same sense of ?importance? in how things are done. especially things like i've just listed. so even though no words were spoken about them, i had a feeling that -she'd- want to "properly complete" our ceremonies. so i envisioned her handing me the ring i sent her... me getting on my knee and asking her to please spend her life with me as my wife, and then -i- would put my ring on her.

i saw her wanting to do the same thing with the ring she gave me...

and i also envisioned her removing my cuff (with permission, of course) and giving it, no, handing it back to me. i'm not sure if i saw her on her knees or not... probably not... but I did see her giving me her wrist so i could put the cuff of my ownership on her, myself. while it may seem a ?trivial? detail, it's really not, as the act of doing, and doing it "properly", lends a sense of decorum to the whole ceremony.

and i admit, i also had visions of her kneeling in front of me, holding her hair aside and extending her neck to me for me to put my collar on her, thereby taking ownership of her completely. after which she'd bend over, offer me her ass and then she'd be -completely- my property.

maybe next time.