My own worst enemy?

so it would seem..

when i talk, i say things that she thinks mean i'm no longer interested in her.

when i write, i write things that make her think i'm no longer interested in her.

she tells me that when i hold on tightly, it makes her pull away, so i should hold on loosely.

if i would keep my mouth shut and not say anything then maybe i won't push her away.

if i -try- to "have" her or "win" her it'll push her further away.

if i try to see her or find her, since it wouldn't be her idea she'd have no choice but to pull far away.

if i try to convince her to leave or to be with me, or if i try to point things out, reason with her, show her the logical actions that make sense to me, it'll push her away.

so caring for her, loving her, wanting her, talking to her, trying to show her that there's another path in life - all those things are counterproductive and will only increase her distance.

when she's pushed me from her life i should be downright irresistable.