i'm slipping. i thought the peace/calm/whatever i felt over the weekend would carry me until she got back, but i'm slipping.
being busy helps a little but only for a few minutes at a time.
being aware of her alter ego hasn't helped any. on the other hand, in some way it makes me more sure than ever that she has no intention of ever meeting.
65 hours and counting.
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About Me
- Student of Life
- Mid-life, divorced. My Description - Probably immature - "arrested development"? Probably selfish, self centered, emotionally immature. Insecure. Someone else's description: "a warm, interesting, stimulating, sincere, funny, sexual, imaginative, caring, giving man". You reconcile the two, I can't.
Cast of Characters
- me - 50ish, divorced. Married almost 18 years. I've discovered a lot about my own sexuality and what I want sexually. I found B in July 2003.
- B - female, 40. Was in a serious, live in love relationship for 14 years. Married for almost two years now. We made an almost instant sexual, emotional and intellectual connection. B is the most sexual, sensual woman I've ever known. She's professional, a business owner, strong, hard headed, stubborn, up standing.
- bf - B's
boyfriendhusband.
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2006
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- and none of that matters because...
- denial, truth, honesty, respect
- this can't be good
- another one, gone for good.
- and still... no.
- huh
- regular days, life & lessons
- quittin' time
- so there
- sliding
- slipping
- a peaceful weekend
- and so it goes
- wtf is wrong with me???
- the light bulb starts to glow
- well... there you go
- (pluck)(pluck)(pluck)
- bottom line, rev. 257
- what do i say?
- wish i knew me
- what a wonderful day
- what a spectacular day
- maybe learning is still possible
- scientific fact
- i give
- interesting dichotomy
- a(nother) sign of the times
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October
(27)
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